One of my favorite Stephen Sondheim songs — “Everybody Says Don’t” (on the player embedded above) — is from his first official flop, Anyone Can Whistle, which starred Angela Lansbury, Harry Guardino, and Lee Remick on Broadway in 1964 and ran for nine performances.
Among other topics, the plot explored the classic question of who is saner — the folks in a mental hospital or those who are not.
“Everybody Says Don’t” invites us to consider how we make choices.
Many of us make choices based on what other people say or think.
Sometimes this demonstrates a healthy respect for our shared values as human beings — and helps to keep our societies more, rather than less, civil.
Sometimes it’s a way to avoid saying or doing something important — something which might be utterly, uniquely, and profoundly why we are alive here and now on planet earth.
I might have stayed in my non-musical day job as a PR/development/events professional for another 16 years if I hadn’t been laid off.
The job offered me teamwork, camaraderie, shared purpose, a paycheck, respect from my peers, and daily surprises/challenges.
But it was not tapping very deeply into my musical soul.
Now I am devoted to making music for a living — as a performer, a songwriter, and a Music Together teacher.
The sentiment of “Everybody Says Don’t” reminds me of one of the guiding principles of Music Together — that anything a child chooses to do during class is fine and needs to be respected as part of their learning process/style.
A child’s caregiver may want them to sit still and “play” a drum — or a shaker egg, or a triangle, or a set of wooden sticks — in a particular manner.
But their way of soaking up the music in class may involve moving their bodies around the room, sitting in a corner (seemingly disconnected from everything happening in class), or bouncing up and down in someone’s lap.
As long as the child is not endangering themselves or hurting someone else in class, s/he is free to respond to the music in her/his own fashion — which may change from song to song and class to class.
I sometimes imagine the adult caregivers (moms, dads, nannies, grand mothers, grand fathers, au pairs, uncles, aunts and more) as younger versions of themselves — who may have been told somewhere along the line: “don’t sing so loudly,” or “don’t sing out of tune,” or worst of all, “don’t sing — just move your lips.”
One never knows what musical wounds people may be bringing into our classrooms…
As one teacher remarked at the end of a three day Music Together seminar, “90% of our job is showing up with a compassionate heart.”
I guess that could be true about a lot of our interactions here on planet earth…
Deep breath in.
Deep breath out.
Thank you for reading and listening to this blog post.
I welcome any comments you might be inspired to share below.
amusicalifeonplanetearth 
Hi Will–
I’m so happy to hear that you’re doing music 100% now, including songwriting and teaching little kids! Maybe we could go to an open mic together sometime. Happy spring!
Melinda
Thanks for visiting my blog. Travel safely around the planet!
Will, I have forwarded this to my brother who was just laid off. I told him he should sub “musical soul” with “outdoors soul”. Beautifully written testament to being true to yourself. Thanks!
Thanks, Jennie! You are a HUGE and patient part of my transformation, and I think about you almost every day. Sorry to hear about your brother. Being laid off can be a big shock. However, it might lead him to something better… ooo w
That’s what we are hoping. Looking forward to seeing you on Saturday!
Yippee!
Didn’t realize you were laid off, but I can see a good world has opened before you. I have sent this post to Arlington family.
Thanks! I am grateful to have more time for music, for writing, for riding my bike, for walking, for singing, and for seeing more details of each day as it unfolds. And the children and families I am meeting as a result of Music Together are delightful!
Awesome that you’re a Music Together teacher. (I clicked your link and checked it out–I’m always in favor of education that supports children’s creativity instead of hindering it!) I often wonder what I might have done with music if I had been allowed to be free with it. (I grew up in a very uptight German-Lutheran setting).
Thanks for listening, Tracy! I do a lot of reading about songwriters, and I am biased in favor of the days (often pre-microphone and amplified sound) when songs had true rhymes — which, among other things, aid in comprehension of the lyrics.
Sometimes a pink slip is the nudge we need to follow our hearts. I’m glad you’re following yours. I enjoyed the song–especially the “But I say DO!”
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Lovely recordings, Will! How empowering these messages must be to your students! ❤ A retired teacher, I found that teaching is a very fulfilling career. All the best!
Thank you for reading, listening AND commenting, Cheryl. I agree that teaching can bring profound rewards…
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I love music, absolutely love most genres of music but my memories of being taught music at school are of being bored and disinterested. It was only discovering at the age of eight that there was a lunchtime recorder club run by a wonderful teacher who made us as enthusiastic as he was that kept my interest alive. Classroom lessons where we all had to clap unending rhythms and then were given percussion instruments to ‘play’ continued to be boring.
Well done you, Will – for your enthusiasm and for taking that enthusiasm and skill to young and old people in your community as well as to us, all your followers on WP.
I think (sadly) your experience of music classes as a child are shared by many… Hurrah for the enthusiasm of the recorder club teacher! i forget where I was reading it, but I think folks are affirming (with data-driven studies) that a teacher’s authentic enthusiasm for their subject matter is hugely influential on the learning (or non-learing) experience of their students. I feel very fortunate that I had an elementary school teacher — Mrs. Imhoff (whose first name I only learned as an adult was Maybelle!) who was very passionate about music and nurtured my love of music and singing.
Maybelle! What a glorious name! I think the study affirms what I have always suspected about the enthusiasm or otherwise of school teachers.
Yes. I was charmed to learn Mrs. Imhoff’s first name when I made a small donation to my former school in her memory. The passion and enthusiasm of educators can be contagious… and inspire authentic curiosity and learning!
A great song and post, Will. We are creative until we are told we are not! Sadly, this happens early in life many times. It takes a lot of effort to overcome the “don’t” in life.
Yes, Dwight. Depending upon who said “don’t” and how vulnerable we were at the time, one “don’t” can change the entire trajectory of a person’s life…
Yes, I agree. A lot of young boys were told they could not sing and grow up without that joy.
That is one reason why having a few male, music-loving teachers (like I am guessing you were…) can be a blessing to all students/children.
Yes, that is for sure!